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Index » Internet/Computer » The Web » Epic Facebook Statuses Page: 1, 2, 3 ... 24, 25, 26  Next
Post to this Topic
oldviolin

oldviolin Avatar

Location: esse quam videri
Gender: Male


Posted: Oct 5, 2021 - 10:45am

 sirdroseph wrote:
Ray Wylie Hubbard's FB status this morning{#Lol}
 
well..i glad that's over.
thanks for all your kind words.
i do appreciate it.
okay. time to do it again.
i'd like to take this opportunity to say i'm sorry about something and i promise it will never happen again. i guess i wasn't paying attention. i know that's no excuse but what happened was i found a pair of jeans stuffed in the back of the closet i hadn't worn in about 3 years and i looked at the label and it said.. affliction.....
my heart sang as i realized my hip status is in the toilet.
i got them at an outlet mail on sale and i don't really notice that stuff and i guess they got by me. i am indeed sorry and i will take them to the wimberley thrift store in the morning before i head to baton rouge.
the reason i even bring this up was at the gig at greune hall sunday some dudes i was standing around with were kinna making fun of someone who was acting real big shot ego show off jerky and was decked out in that label's matching shirt and jeans where it almost looked like a affliction jumpsuit.
now if you like affliction that's all well and good if you act nice while wearing it but if you ain't nice and wear it..then you come across more as a goober dumbass than if you weren't wea..well, you get the picture. except for me..even if i'm nice and wearing the jeans i come across as a setting on hew haw straw hay bale unhip gomer pyle goober dumbass.
something about wearing affliction while showing off or shouting out requests increases the gooberness factor like a six pack of schlitz on an empty stomach was the consensus of the gruene hall dudes i was hanging with.
i myself try not to judge people by what they wear unless its a country music video and then its blow the guitar holdingi backward ball cap aviator sunglasses male model la bare dancer duck call cause its open season babycakes ( too over the top?)
i really shouldn't speak (well i'm not really, i'm typing) as the only thing i know about fashion was when we did the jimmy fallon show a while back it was fashion week in new york and everyone seemed to know we weren't there for that.
onward.
now i haven't played in louisana in a long time so i'm really looking forward to the gigs there. any place where they suck a crawdad's head has got to dig me.
i got some other..i don't what you wanna call them..hints, tricks, secrets..just some stuff i've learned through out my so called career that i'll throw at you here pretty soon.
so get you some breath and bait it and wait with it..
yours truly,
rwh


 pony up and belly out!

oldviolin

oldviolin Avatar

Location: esse quam videri
Gender: Male


Posted: Oct 5, 2021 - 10:34am

 oldviolin wrote:


 

 
oh no he dittin!
Coaxial

Coaxial Avatar

Location: 543 miles west of Paradis,1491 miles eas
Gender: Male


Posted: Jun 2, 2020 - 8:06am

When asked what he was watching during lockdown Terry Gilliam, of Monty Python fame, said " Boris Johnson's attempt to mate with Trump".
Proclivities

Proclivities Avatar

Location: Paris of the Piedmont
Gender: Male


Posted: May 29, 2020 - 11:42am

Not "epic", but pretty funny:

haresfur

haresfur Avatar

Location: The Golden Triangle
Gender: Male


Posted: Dec 29, 2019 - 1:58pm



 SeriousLee wrote:
From my youngest daughter, who loves snow.
SnowlessDecember
 


SeriousLee

SeriousLee Avatar

Location: Dans l'milieu d'deux milles livres


Posted: Dec 29, 2019 - 8:17am

From my youngest daughter, who loves snow.
SnowlessDecember
Coaxial

Coaxial Avatar

Location: 543 miles west of Paradis,1491 miles eas
Gender: Male


Posted: Dec 29, 2019 - 8:07am

Not a status but a comment regarding a story about a mother duck adopting 9 ducklings to join her crew of 7...
Nice ! She will be able to breastfeed them.{#Eek}
Alexandra

Alexandra Avatar

Location: PNW
Gender: Female


Posted: Dec 14, 2015 - 8:07pm

 ScottFromWyoming wrote:

Sounds like a weird gangland slaying.

 
 

ScottFromWyoming

ScottFromWyoming Avatar

Location: Powell
Gender: Male


Posted: Dec 14, 2015 - 7:37pm

 Alexandra wrote:
From my friend in Cincinnati who works in a fufu beer and wine place.
 
Just texted someone that I tapped the Mad Elf. Does that sound dirty?

 
Sounds like a weird gangland slaying.
Alexandra

Alexandra Avatar

Location: PNW
Gender: Female


Posted: Dec 14, 2015 - 5:09pm

From my friend in Cincinnati who works in a fufu beer and wine place.
 
Just texted someone that I tapped the Mad Elf. Does that sound dirty?
ScottFromWyoming

ScottFromWyoming Avatar

Location: Powell
Gender: Male


Posted: Nov 5, 2015 - 9:10am

 Coaxial wrote:
Elizabeth White

The 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud lady, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with her hair fashionably coifed and makeup perfectly applied, even though she is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today. Her husband of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, she smiled sweetly when told her room was ready. As she maneuvered her walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of her tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on her window. “I love it,” she stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy. “Mrs. Jones, you haven’t seen the room …. just wait.” “That doesn’t have anything to do with it,” she replied. “Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged, it’s how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. It’s a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do. Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open I’ll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I’ve stored away, just for this time in my life.” She went on to explain, “Old age is like a bank account, you withdraw from what you’ve put in. So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories Thank you for your part in filling my Memory bank. I am still depositing.” And with a smile, she said: “Remember the five simple rules to be happy: 1. Free your heart from hatred. 2. Free your mind from worries. 3. Live simply. 4. Give more. 5. Expect less. ( Disclaimer I did not personally write this beautiful story. I was moved by it and wanted to share )



 
Pretty good advice. Got a little too glurgy by the end.
Coaxial

Coaxial Avatar

Location: 543 miles west of Paradis,1491 miles eas
Gender: Male


Posted: Nov 5, 2015 - 9:02am

Elizabeth White

The 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud lady, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o’clock, with her hair fashionably coifed and makeup perfectly applied, even though she is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today. Her husband of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, she smiled sweetly when told her room was ready. As she maneuvered her walker to the elevator, I provided a visual description of her tiny room, including the eyelet sheets that had been hung on her window. “I love it,” she stated with the enthusiasm of an eight-year-old having just been presented with a new puppy. “Mrs. Jones, you haven’t seen the room …. just wait.” “That doesn’t have anything to do with it,” she replied. “Happiness is something you decide on ahead of time. Whether I like my room or not doesn’t depend on how the furniture is arranged, it’s how I arrange my mind. I already decided to love it. It’s a decision I make every morning when I wake up. I have a choice; I can spend the day in bed recounting the difficulty I have with the parts of my body that no longer work, or get out of bed and be thankful for the ones that do. Each day is a gift, and as long as my eyes open I’ll focus on the new day and all the happy memories I’ve stored away, just for this time in my life.” She went on to explain, “Old age is like a bank account, you withdraw from what you’ve put in. So, my advice to you would be to deposit a lot of happiness in the bank account of memories Thank you for your part in filling my Memory bank. I am still depositing.” And with a smile, she said: “Remember the five simple rules to be happy: 1. Free your heart from hatred. 2. Free your mind from worries. 3. Live simply. 4. Give more. 5. Expect less. ( Disclaimer I did not personally write this beautiful story. I was moved by it and wanted to share )


haresfur

haresfur Avatar

Location: The Golden Triangle
Gender: Male


Posted: Nov 4, 2015 - 5:15pm

Actually a comment not a status:

"Why are there so many people who advocate laws to punish or try to prevent people from trying to make themselves feel good. Should we have cumulative or concurrent punishments for smoking a doobie after sex with a robot?" 
Coaxial

Coaxial Avatar

Location: 543 miles west of Paradis,1491 miles eas
Gender: Male


Posted: Sep 24, 2015 - 7:53pm

 haresfur wrote:

 
"}">
Pope Visits the Sick


 
{#Clap}
haresfur

haresfur Avatar

Location: The Golden Triangle
Gender: Male


Posted: Sep 24, 2015 - 7:38pm


 
Pope Visits the Sick

ScottFromWyoming

ScottFromWyoming Avatar

Location: Powell
Gender: Male


Posted: Sep 8, 2015 - 6:36pm

Everyone should just follow my friend Grady:
 

In modern day America, if you have a genius kid, it's pretty much a given that the little blighter will get violin lessons. Why violin? The kid's already got a social handicap. Why not guitar? It's a great way to make friends, and the world could always use a few more genius guitar players.

And no, I'm not talking about bass guitar. This is about IMPROVING sociability.

 
Coaxial

Coaxial Avatar

Location: 543 miles west of Paradis,1491 miles eas
Gender: Male


Posted: Sep 7, 2015 - 7:15am

 ScottFromWyoming wrote:
My friend Grady again:
 
Yay! The excavator is back online, and I only have two nuts leftover. I know what you're thinking: "But Grady, that's just one more than you need to win the Tour de France." 

 
I see what he did there.
ScottFromWyoming

ScottFromWyoming Avatar

Location: Powell
Gender: Male


Posted: Sep 7, 2015 - 7:10am

My friend Grady again:
 
Yay! The excavator is back online, and I only have two nuts leftover. I know what you're thinking: "But Grady, that's just one more than you need to win the Tour de France." 
haresfur

haresfur Avatar

Location: The Golden Triangle
Gender: Male


Posted: Jun 30, 2015 - 5:10pm


Red_Dragon

Red_Dragon Avatar



Posted: May 23, 2015 - 7:51am

 buzz wrote: 
See what you're missing out on?
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