4. Negative thoughts feed on each other. You may worry about not having enough money. Next you think, “What if I lose my job?” Then you wonder you could ask for help and next thing, you’re feeling alone and unsupported. Rumination can turn a controllable problem into a set of insurmountable difficulties.

5. The things you do to avoid or try to cope with feeling negative emotions may be more counterproductive than the emotions themselves. You may turn to alcohol, marijuana, or excess use of prescription drugs to escape feeling bad. These substances can have long-term negative effects on mood and motivation and have addictive properties. Turning to food excessively can lead to overweight or obesity and low self-esteem associated with weight gain. Getting angry and blaming others for your negative emotions can strain your relationships. Retail therapy can lead to debt.

What You Can Do

If suppression doesn’t work, what can you do with sad, angry or anxious feelings? Below are six surprising coping strategies that can help.

1. Allow Feelings In

The feelings will be there anyway, so why not take a look at them? Perhaps they have a message for you about something in your life that needs to change. Perhaps they are a symptom of past, unresolved painful events that need more processing and attention. They may signal strong unmet needs that would be helpful to pay attention to. When you invite emotions in and let them be there, they become less scary and shameful. They will naturally run their course and move on through.

2. Untangle Feelings From Negative Judgments

You may have learned negative messages about emotions from your family or culture. Perhaps you learned emotions are a sign of weakness or that they make you vulnerable and unprotected. As you begin to untangle the feelings themselves from your negative judgments about them, emotions become more palatable. You begin to create more space for them and listen to them more. You become more self-aware of your reactions and of what people and situations are personal triggers.

3. Notice the Connection Between Feelings and Events

Feelings provide information about what you find pleasant or unpleasant; whom you love and whom you fear. Once you understand the connection between events in your life, your thoughts and your feelings, you are better prepared to take good care of yourself and protect your own boundaries. You begin to anticipate how you will react to certain people or events, which allows you to make better choices about how you spend your time. You can anticipate emotionally high-risk situations and prepare coping strategies in advance.

4. Broaden the View

Anxiety and depression make your thinking more rigid—you focus on the negative, which can lead to catastrophizing and magnifying the problem. This makes you feel even more stuck. It can help to deliberately take a step back and to ask yourself if there is a different way to look at the situation, or how an uninvolved observer might see things. Doing something you enjoy instead of worrying can create positive affect that naturally broadens your thinking. This can lead you to come up with more creative solutions that you won’t see when caught up in a negative emotional loop.

5. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is both a set of practices and a way of thinking about life that is based on Buddhist traditions that are 3,000 years old. Being mindful means having a gentle, open and accepting attitude toward your own experiences and surroundings, whatever those may be. As Eckhart Tolle, a writer and spiritual teacher, once stated: “Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it.” Meditating, focusing on your breath, or taking a nature walk and focusing on the sights, smells, and sounds are good ways to learn how to be mindful. Mindfulness creates a spaciousness of mind that allows emotions to be there without clinging to them.

6. Find Support

Sometimes, emotions can be difficult to manage alone because it’s so hard to step out of your point of view and see things objectively. It can help to get support and feedback from a friend, colleague or family member. Let the person know exactly what you are looking for, whether it is emotional support, information or resources to help. Psychotherapy can provide you with expert guidance, coping strategies and emotional support to calm negative emotions and find clarity and courage to move forward in life.

Although negative emotions are a challenge, there are effective ways to cope. By practicing these strategies, you will become more tolerant of them and less likely to get caught up in downward spirals of gloom and doom.